Heartbreak

My heart is breaking, and as much as I try to hold on, I can't help but cave.  I lack strength.  I turned everything off and crawled into my bed.  I've never heard so much noise from the earth as I am hearing right now.  First monsoon of 2015.  First heavy monsoon of my life.  It feels like my apartment could collapse and crush me at any moment.  It's strangely comforting because my heart feels like this weather- shocked, frightened, dark, and beaten.  How can this rain and storm feel so violent? Where did all this come from... Just like my heart is feeling, it came out of nowhere.  Unexpected. 

I spent the weekend in Phoenix at the hospital and with little sleep.  I spent the last two days crying with a heavy heart over my love.  And now I'm processing and friends warn me to not fall into a depression, but I look around and wonder if I need to allow myself some time to feel this tormented burden of disappointment and sadness.  Hope feels far away from me tonight, but I have to believe- just as this storm is hiding the sun- it will come again. 

Joey and Rory

I recently discovered the music of Joey and Rory, a talented husband/wife from Columbia, TN.  In finding their music, I found hope.  They are a young couple singing songs that connect with what I believe and value.  They sing wonderful songs but also the old, wonderful hymns like "In The Garden", "Have You Been Washed in the Blood".  I love these hymns and their authenticity as people.  They are a humble people, and it's easy to see that by the way they homestead, serve, and remain grateful. 
I also see the love between the couple, and to me, it is inspiring love.  After discovering their music, I also found out that Joey's cervical cancer has come back, and she has stage four cancer now.  Even though I don't know this precious lady personally, I feel like I know her, and my heart breaks for her.  This couple has a one year old girl named Indiana.  She is the light of their lives, born with down syndrome. 
I have been following Rory's blog, This Life I Live, and I am praying for them.  Please keep them in your prayers as well.  I am reminded that as believers we are guaranteed persecution... Life is so hard, confusing at times... (thinking of Charleston, SC) but our faith continues on and we know He is with us. 
Bless this precious couple, Jesus, and be glorified.  Comfort, ease the pain, restore her body, I pray.